One of Those Days....

While riding my bike to work this morning, I contemplated the beautiful weather. This summer has been a veritable sauna, and by the time I get to work every day, my back is soaked to the bone with sweat, and my brow is not only covered with helmet marks but with beads of salty water. This morning however was different. It was absolutely gorgeous: overcast instead of sunny and cool instead of sweltering. I decided that I wouldn't book it to work but that I would leisurely roll along on my commute to enjoy the beautiful weather. As I pedaled, random thoughts crept into my head. . .

"No skirt, I'm good to go."

"God damn it. You there---bicyclist--yes you---that's a stooooooooppppppp sign. Just because you're a bicyclist does NOT mean that you're exempt to traffic laws."

"Look how good I am. I'm waiting at the stop-light. . . until. it.turns...green...even though a car isn't coming....jesus...I should just run the light...noooo....yes....noooo...yesss....nooooo, I'm not exempt to traffic laws."

"Bicyclists need to be doubly defensive drivers. They not only have to protect themselves from cars but from other bicyclists who think that they're exempt to the rules of the road. Hey. I should write a blog post about this. I'll call it 'On the Double Defensive'. Yeah!"

"I should have eaten breakfast."

The thoughts rambled on. Somewhere in there, I stopped at a stop light as a good little bicyclist should. And then I looked down. Somehow, while waiting at the stoplight, I turned my palm face-up (how does that happen on a bicycle?), and a bird took the liberty of shitting on my palm. Now, I was immediately and thoroughly repulsed, but I had to maintain my composure. After all, I have my bicyclist image to maintain and cannot be publicly wriggling and writhing in disgust. So instead of publicly showing my disgust, I did the next best thing and maintained my palm open and upward-facing. With the light turning green and with two blocks remaining on my bike commute, I had to think quickly. It wasn't rocket science, but I decided to use my fingertips to maneuver the bicycle and the break. Thank god the shit didn't hit the fan...or the handlebar. Still, I think the bird was trying to tell me that it was going to be one of those days.....